For those of you who peaked in high school, this article is right up your alley! You’ve never worked hard throughout your early education years so why would you have to work during your adult years as well? That’s some craziness if I do say so myself. So I am here to tend to your well being and tell you some tips and tricks on how to live the most stress-free but successful life.
First tip: You NEED a living arrangement. Stop trying hard to save up for that over priced loft apartment because honestly…it’s kind of embarrassing. What you need to do is gather up all of your unwashed clothes and personal items, march right to your parents’ house, and cozy up in their stinky cobwebbed basement. Nothing is better than the stench of moldy floors and laundry detergent. With the help of loving parents, you are able to accomplish anything. Don’t overcompensate though. You need to make sure that they are wealthy and stable enough to pay for your things and do your laundry so you don’t have to lift a finger.
Second tip: You need to keep in contact with all of your best friends that you went to high school with. What you need to do is distract them from becoming the best version of themselves. That means no growing a family, no marriage, and if they do want to be married, become the best man and make them sign a prenup. The reason for all of this is that you need them to be completely available so you can invite them over for video games and snacks. You can’t be the loser that plays video games by themselves. Are you kidding? Oh! And make sure you attend every single football game that your High School puts on. It doesn’t matter if you have already graduated because I’m sure that your AP Calculus teacher would love to see you in the stands. It’s like living your class years all over again. What a time! With all of this dopamine rushing through your system, stress will be the last thing on your mind.
Third tip: Now, not all parents are lenient when it comes to money. Some parents will force you to get a part time job. Luckily for you, there are so many part time jobs available for angels like yourself! For example: I’m sure that you have a local Chuck E. Cheese somewhere in your town. I recommend waltzing in there like a baddie and demanding that spot for the head Charles mascot. This is definitely going to be the prime time of your life so you can’t blow this opportunity. One plus side is that on your break you can have yourself an old mismatched pizza platter! The best thing is that with all the money you will be making, you can use it to buy exclusive Fortnite skins. WOW!
Now, I could go on and on about the necessities to become a resilient superstar, but I will have to cut this one short. These are the best tips that anyone could ask for, so I’m sure that if you follow these IN ORDER, you will have no problem with living life to the fullest. I wish anyone who reads this well and remembers to follow their dreams.