- Quaggos (n) /Quag-ous/
Origin: An abbreviated version of the “Dungeons & Dragons” monster, Quagoloth
Definition: A wild creature that is crazed with a burst of energy.
The chocolate milk was green and separating, morphing and brewing in its plastic bottle like an alien sludge. Disgusting, causing me to throw up on my carpet, just before my aunt’s funeral showing. Poor old Aunt Helen, she was something like a grandmother to me. Gone are the days of picking blueberries and peaches in the summer air. After my parents and I left the casket, it was the moment I’d been waiting for all week. Sammy was coming home with me. We picked him up and paid his hefty price in hard cash to the sweet old Amish woman who raised him.
Who is Sammy? I will tell you: He is a fluffy pug with a big heart and even larger eyes. I truly believe that Sammy is the pinnacle of all pughood. He is the most picturesque and iconic-looking specimen of his species. He’s 3 years old, born in January, he weighs just over 20 pounds, his eyes are brown, with a faun color coat, his favorite toy is a corduroy gingerbread man that squeaks.
I did not choose the name Sammy, the Amish family who raised him for four months did. They taught him to know his name and house trained him, so it was a no-brainer to keep it as it was. Now that I know and love him, it’s impossible to imagine him being called anything other than Sammy. Although Sammy is his true name, he possesses nicknames beyond fathomable numeration. You can call him anything you want. Some of my favorites are Big Sam, Little Sam, Chunk, Pugs, Sham, the controversial yet genius Osammy bin Laden, and Quaggos. Quaggos is the only name that nobody could understand. The title was given to him at the infamous Leap of Quaggos, where as a young puppy too scared to go down the porch steps, he decided to jump down all of them like a maniac.
Every day Sammy brings me immeasurable joy with his goofy antics. Dogs are incapable of understanding humor, so all the dumb stuff does, he’s 100% serious. That’s what gets me, that he’s dead serious about being afraid of a plant or something like that. No matter what happens, Sammy will always be the most perfect, scaredy cat pug full of life and personality. He is truly a good dog.
WAIT BE CAREFUL! If ever you are in the circumstance that you are leaving my house, whether by exiting the door or pulling out of my driveway, Sammy will throw a royal meltdown. Don’t get too close to him when he’s barking shrill, screeching barks, as he may accidentally chomp you. If he clings to your leg, just shake him off. Although it’s hard because he’s so heartbroken by your leaving, the best thing to do in situations like the one described is ignore him. You have been warned.
